Scott and I sit at a secluded table in the restaurant where we decided to meet for drinks. It is several weeks after he proposed to me at the lake, and he’d like to know if I’ve made a decision. He looks at me with uncertainty, and reaches for my hand. Lacing his fingers through mine, he smiles nervously. The waiter approaches our table, and I order a glass of wine, thinking maybe it’ll calm my ragged nerves. I think I know what I’m going to tell him, but suddenly, I am losing confidence in my decision. What if I’m making the wrong choice? Whatever I decide to do, there’ll be no turning back. I sit silently, continuing to ponder what action I should take. The waiter brings my drink, and I immediately bring the glass to my lips, taking a big drink. I take a deep breath, and look into Scott’s eyes. God, he looks so intense right now…not to mention absolutely gorgeous.
“You look beautiful tonight.” He says softly. “I haven’t been able to think about anything but you since that night. I know you’ve needed time to think, but I have to say that I was relieved when you called.”
“Were you really so stressed over this?” I ask in disbelief. Up until recently, I didn’t think he was capable of feeling anything real. But as I study him, I’m thinking perhaps he has changed…maybe grown up a little.
“Are you kidding?” he laughs nervously. “Of course I have. I asked you to be my wife, and I meant it. Waiting for your answer has had me going crazy.”
“Scott,” I begin. “I’m sorry that I have taken so long to give you an answer. You have been so patient, and I thank you for that. I want to be honest with you. It’s just that…I’m so scared to accept that you actually care about me. We’ve always been good together physically, but up until recently, we’ve never been able to connect anywhere else. Before we tried to be anything more, we were great friends. I can remember the hours of phone conversations we had together back then. Being friends was so easy, but once we tried to take it further…You broke my heart, Scott. Not just once, but I let you do it to me over and over again, hoping someday you’d love me the way I loved you. It seems as though you’ve changed, but how do I know you won’t do it again? How can I know I can trust you?”
“I know I’ve hurt you, and I’m so sorry for that.” He begins quietly. “I have no explanation for how I treated you other than the fact that I wasn’t mature enough to be able to handle your feelings for me. Frankly, it scared the hell out of me. I couldn’t understand how you could know you loved me at only sixteen. At the time, I just wanted someone to fool around with. I wasn’t ready for anything serious, but I’m not like that anymore. Please, try to believe me. It has taken me so long to admit this to myself…and much too long in admitting it to you, but I love you. If you’ll give me the chance, I’ll prove it to you.”
“Scott, please,” I say as I reach into my purse and pull out the ring he gave me. “I think I should give this back to you.” I place the ring in his hand.
“I see.” He says, a look of unshielded disappointment in his eyes. “So you’ve made your decision, then?”
“I have.” I reply, looking into his beautiful blue-green eyes. “And I have to give it back to you…if you’re going to put it on my finger, right?”
“What?!” he asks, stunned. “Do you mean, your answer is ‘yes?'”
“Yes, Scott. I think you’ve proven your feelings for me. For the first time since I’ve known you, I finally feel like you’re being open with me.”
Almost leaping from his seat, he kneels next to me, and with shaking hands, he takes my hand, which is also shaking. Trying to calm himself, he takes a deep breath, and slides the beautiful ring on my finger. He looks up into my eyes, and smiles warmly. He lightly brushes my cheek with the back of his hand. I close my eyes, enjoying his touch. He stands, and tips my chin up before kissing me softly on the lips.
“I love you.” He says, his voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you for giving me another chance.”
“Scott, part of me has been waiting for this for fifteen years. As much as I wanted to, I never really stopped loving you. I could never understand why I couldn’t get you out of my system.” I say, looking into his eyes. “Now, I guess I understand.”
“Let’s get out of here.” Scott suggests. “I want to take you home with me tonight.”
After paying our waiter for our drinks, Scott and I leave the restaurant. His fingers laced through mine, he walks me to my car. Once there, he leans toward me, pressing me against the car, and kisses me passionately. He breaks the kiss, and opens the car door for me. I get in, start the engine, and wait for him to get into his Sonoma. He starts it, and leads the way out of the restaurant parking lot. After a short drive, we arrive at his home. As we walk to the entrance, he rests his hand on the small of my back. Unlocking the door, he takes my hand and leads me to the living room. We sit, facing one another on the sofa. We need to discuss how to proceed.
“How can I help you get out?” he asks, referring to Adam. “How is he going to react to this?”
“I don’t know.” I reply. “I’d rather leave him before he ever knows you’re involved. I don’t want him to come after you.”
“What about Emma?” He asks. “You have to bring her too.”
“You mean that?” I ask, surprised.
“Of course.” He replies. “You shouldn’t even ask that. She’s your daughter, and I know you’d be miserable without her. She’s beautiful, and I want her to be with us, too. Honestly, when I first met her, I wondered what she’d have looked like if she were mine. You’re going to try to get custody of her, right?”
“Yeah, but again, if he knows you’re involved, he’ll make it impossible for me.”
“You’re probably right.” Scott admits. “We’ll need to keep our relationship quiet for now, until everything’s settled. When are you going to file for divorce?”
“I actually already have,” I reveal. “My attorney is planning to serve him with the papers at work tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry you’ve been so unhappy. If I had told you how I felt about you sooner, maybe you wouldn’t have married him.” He says softly.
“Well, I have to look at it this way…if I hadn’t married him, I wouldn’t have Emma, and I can’t imagine what my life would be like without her. She’s the one good thing out of my relationship with him.” I say, reflecting on my life. “Anyway, can we please change the subject? You have made tonight wonderful. For the first time in longer than I can remember, I’m feeling good about life. I have a future I can look forward to…with you. I want to celebrate.”
Approaching him, I sit on his lap, straddling him. Grinning, he looks up at me, and curls his fingers around my waist. His blue-green eyes sparkle in the light. I lean down and kiss him softly on the lips. “I want to make love to my fiancé.”
I unbutton his shirt, and run my hands over his neck and chest. Returning my lips to his, I kiss him deeply. He moans against my lips, and slides his hands up my back.
“I love you.” He whispers into my ear. He then trails light kisses down my neck. “I promise to do everything I can to make you happy.”
“I know you will, Scott.” I say, looking into his eyes. I remove his shirt and toss it to the floor. He, in turn, slides his hands under my skirt, curling a finger around the waistband of my thong underwear. He tugs them downward, and I kick them to the floor. Unzipping his jeans, I slide my hand into his boxers and curl my fingers around him. He groans as I grip him, and closes his eyes. I play with him for a while, and then help push his jeans down. I position myself just right, and looking into his eyes, I slowly take him inside me. I slide up and down his length, slowly at first
, trying to keep control. I hear him groan my name as his grasps my butt, pushing himself deeper. Whimpering, I br
ing my lips to his, and kiss him deeply. His tongue dances with mine, and I feel control slipping away. Panting, my pace quickens. I can feel myself tighten around him…I’m about to lose it. He, meanwhile, has closed his eyes, his head resting on the back of the couch, moaning in pleasure. He clutches my hips and takes control from below, thrusting upward into me. I cry out, begging him not to stop. Changing our positions, he lays me down on the couch, and kisses me deeply as he re-enters me. My muscles grip him tightly as he drives himself deeper. I arch my back and wrap my legs around him, begging for more. I can feel the heat of his breath on my neck and hair as he pushes himself as deep as he can. Trembling, I can feel myself coming apart. I whimper his name and dig my nails into his back. Trying to hold back his release, he slows. He brings his hands up to my breasts, and assaults me with long, deep strokes. Unable to hold on any longer, I orgasm, gasping and crying out his name.
“I love you.” He moans into my ear. “I want to make love to you all night.”
His pace quickens, and he becomes more intense. I know he’s on the edge. I feel another wave of pleasure wash over me, and I am writhing in ecstasy beneath him. His body stiffens, he shudders almost violently, and I hear my name start as a low growl deep within his chest. Finally, he erupts, filling me with liquid heat. He collapses on top of me, his manhood still throbbing inside me. As he allows his breathing to return to normal, I run my fingers through his sweat-dampened hair. Completely relaxed, I almost doze off. Recovered, he lies next to me, and runs his fingers through my hair. I look up at him, drowsy and euphoric, and smile slightly.
“You were amazing.” I say, my eyes only half open. “I love you.”
“I love you.” He replies, touching my face tenderly. “I just want to make you happy. After everything I’ve done to hurt you, I owe you at least that.”
“Scott, I forgive you. We can start over right now.” I say as I look up at him.
He smiles at that, and continues to caress my skin. Excusing himself for a moment, he goes to his bedroom and returns with a blanket. Again joining me on the couch, he covers us with it, and wraps his arms around me. I rest my head on his chest, and let out a deep, satisfied sigh. I can feel his fingers gently rubbing my naked back as I drift off to sleep.
The next morning, I awaken to find that Scott had been watching me sleep. He’s also running his fingers through my hair gently. Finding that I am awake, he smiles warmly.
“Good morning, beautiful.” He says softly. “Did you sleep well?”
“I don’t think I’ve slept so well in years.” I admit. “What time is it?”
“Umm…nine-thirty.” He answers, checking his watch. “Can I get you some breakfast or something?”
“Just some juice or something, thanks.” I reply, looking around for my clothes. “I woke up thinking last night was all a dream until I realized where I am.”
“Honestly, I though the same thing.” He admits with a smile. “Until I saw you lying next to me. I’ll be back.”
After a few moments, he returns with a glass of orange juice, and hands it to me. I thank him, and take a drink. I look around the room, and then back at Scott.
“So it’s really happening?” I ask, more to myself than him. “We’re really getting married?”
“You having second thoughts?” He asks, trying to hide his worry.
“Not at all.” I reassure him. “I just still can’t believe it.”
“Well, if this is a dream, I hope I never wake up.” He says with a relieved smile.
“You were so intense last night.” I say to him as I wrap the blanket around me. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that way until recently. It has surprised me.”
“You’re wondering if it’s real…if it’s going to last?” he asks, reading my mind.
“I just want to make sure this is really what you want.” I begin. “What if you change your mind? What if this is just what you want right now and not the rest of your life?”
“I have thought about this for a long time.” Scott replies. “I’ve had many years to evaluate my feelings for you. At first, I thought I wanted you because you weren’t available. But the more I thought about it, the more sure I was that I loved you. In the past several years, I realized something. You were the only woman in my life that never made a secret of how you felt about me. I knew I’d never find anyone that loved me as much as you did, and I finally realized that I wanted you in my life. I’m just glad you decided to give me another chance. I want to prove it to you.”
Standing, I approach him, and kiss him softly on the lips. “Okay, I believe you. I think I’m still reeling from last night. The way you made love to me…you were so incredible. I don’t know. It just felt like we’re finally in the same place.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean.” He replies. “For years, I’ve felt like you were a part of me, but last night…I felt like my soul was complete. Maybe that’s why it felt so intense. It wasn’t just sex anymore. For once, I wasn’t holding anything back. I was making love to the woman I have adored for years.”
Smiling, I kiss him again, completely touched by his admission. Gathering my clothes, I head for the shower. I close the door behind me, and look into the mirror. Strangely, I notice that I look more serene than I’m used to looking. I turn on the water, and let it run for a few minutes. Once the steam starts to billow around the room, I get in, and let the hot water cascade over my body. Images from last night start racing through my mind. ‘Is this really happening?’ I ask myself. I let the water rush over my head. Hearing a knock on the door, I tell Scott he can come in.
“I thought you might need this,” he says, gesturing to the towel in his hand. He lays it on the counter.
“Thank you.” I say with a smile. “Care to join me?”
He smiles seductively. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Stripping down, he steps into the steamy shower. He stares at my naked, soapy body.
“Damn, you’re sexy.” He breathes. “Come here.”
He approaches, and kisses me deeply as the hot water rushes over our bodies. Pressed so close together, I can feel his manhood spring to life. Breaking the kiss, I drop to my knees, and take his shaft into my mouth. Leaning against the shower wall, Scott lets out a surprised groan. “Oh, God!” he exclaims.
For several minutes, I suck on him, twirling my tongue around him and driving him insane.
“Enough,” he whispers, breathless. The heat in the room is intensifying the experience. “I want you.”
Standing, I kiss him softly. He presses me against the shower wall, and kisses me harder. I part my lips slightly to take a breath, and he slips his tongue between them. He slides his hand between our bodies, and pushes his middle finger into me. I take in a sharp breath, and whimper in pleasure as he finds that special spot. His hand retreats, and with a sexy smile, he brings his hand to his lips and flicks his tongue over his finger. Steadying myself against the shower wall, I bend over in front of him. He curls one arm around me, and enters me from behind. I feel strength leave my knees as I feel him slide into me. Slowly at first, he rhythmically pumps his hips, burying himself to the hilt. I moan uncontrollably, completely enjoying his assault. As I feel myself tighten around him, my pleasured cries grow louder and I beg him not to stop. He grasps my hips, also groaning, and roughly thrusts into me, his control unraveling. My body trembles, and I feel myself coming apart. My release come in waves of extreme pleasure, and by now I am barely able to stand. With a final thrust, burying himself as deep as he can, Scott explodes into
me, crying out in passion. Breathing heavily, we both collapse in a heap on the shower floor. I turn to face him, and stare in amaz
ement. I kiss him tenderly on the lips and run my fingers over his hot, wet skin. “I think we should probably actually shower now.” I say with a grin. Standing, I reach for the body wash, and squirt some into my hand. I rub it on his chest and stomach. He, in turn does the same, and we spend the next several minutes washing one another.
Afterward, we dry off and head for his bedroom. I sit on the edge of the bed, and watch him as he walks around the room with a towel around his waist. Finally, I get up, and begin to get dressed. Approaching me, he takes my left hand and kisses it, right above where his ring is placed. “I know you can’t wear this when you’re around him,” he says. “But at least I know you’ll be with me soon.”
“You know, I don’t think he’ll even notice.” I say, looking at the beautiful piece of jewelry. “I’m always changing my rings, and he’ll probably think it’s just another one of my own. It’s not like we really talk anymore, anyway. I’ll wear it every chance I get.”
“I love you, so much.” He says, smiling. “I can’t wait until you’re mine.”
“I’m already yours,” I reply, touching his chest. “We’ll just have to wait a bit before we can be together. I have to go, okay?”
“I know, baby.” He replies. “When can we see each other again?”
“I don’t know yet. Let me get some things worked out. You have my work and cell numbers.” I say. “I’ll leave my phone on silent so he won’t know when you’re calling.”
“Okay. Let me walk you to your car.” He offers.
We walk out to my car, and he rests his hand on my back. Opening the door for me, I sit in the car and start the engine. Before he closes the door, he kneels in front of me.
“Are you going to be okay?” He asks, looking worried.
“Yeah, sure.” I reply. “I’ll just go back to get some of Emma’s and my things. I’ll rent a small apartment or something until it’s all over. Please don’t worry.”
“I know how he can be, and I know he’s abusive.” He says softly. “Get out of there as soon as you can, okay?”
“Okay, Scott.” I promise. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“All right.” He says, relaxing a bit. He closes the car door and steps back. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” I say before backing down the driveway.