Gettin’ the Switch

uvenile Courtvbcrlfvbcrlf(Scene: a judge’s chambers. Juvenile Court has recently been adjourned for the afternoon.) vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM, POP, and DE JUDGE enter DS Right. MOM has ASHLEY firmly in tow by the ear. She is looking particularly winsome as she winces and grimaces under MOM’s iron grip. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: Well, Ashley, you agreed in the courtroom to take 10 strokes with a hickory switch in lieu of losing your driver’s licence, so let’s proceed. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: Look, folks, let’s be reasonable here. I mean, sure I have 8 unpaid parking tickets, but– vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Don’t you argue with De Judge, young lady! Your irresponsiblilty and poor judgement are just inexcusable. We’ll see if a good whipping will remind you not to park in Handicapped spaces. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE removes his black judicial robes and white powdered wig. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: But it wasn’t like I was there all day– I just ran in the bookstore for a second- and it was the only space left- and besides, I had a sprained ankle!! vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: That’s enough out of you, missy!! (swats her sharply) Your Mom and I have just about had it with your smart mouth and half-baked excuses for your childish behavior. I think a good switching is just what you need, little girl! vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE places the wig on a wigstand and opens a locker wherein he hangs up the robe. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: Pop! I’m 16 1/2 years old!! I’m too big to be whipped- vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: What did your Pop just say about your back talk?? (swats her twice) This sassy attitude is precisely why your Pop and I think you’ve gotten too big for your britches. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP (to De Judge): She’s like this all the time, Your Honor. Her Mom and I are at our wit’s end… vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE turns, now wearing brown Sansabelt slacks and a lime green golf shirt, and flexes a switch which he has taken from the locker. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: Then it seems as if this whipping is not one minute too soon! Young lady, you will approach the desk and bend over! vbcrlfvbcrlfASH, still protesting, tries to back away but is hustled up to the desk by MOM and abruptly bent over it. MOM has been scolding her the whole time and delivers a few quick swats to the seat of her panties. vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: When a grownup tells you to do something, you do it, little girl, you hear? I have had it up to here with your attitude!! vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE approaches, switch in hand. He bends it into a semi-circle and whips it through the air a few times to test its suppleness. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: You will now raise your skirt, young lady. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH starts to frantically protest this order and tries to get up from the desk in desperation. She is thwarted by POP, who rushes to pin her down, while angry MOM flips up the full skirt of her short dress and then goes so far as to yank down her panties and give her daughter several harsh swats on the bare bottom! ASH howls and struggles, but it is useless, POP has her held snugly. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: Mom! What’re you– NO! Oh! Ow! Noo!! vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Don’t you dare try to get up again, young lady, or I’ll have De Judge whip you on your bare bottom! (she jerks the hapless girl’s panties back up) vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: (approvingly) Thank you, ma’m, it’s a pure pleasure to have such cooperative parents. You wouldn’t believe how some folks spoil their children. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: Well, I’m afraid we’ve been letting Ash get altogether out of hand lately. vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Yes, Your Honor, I’m afraid we’re partially to blame. You see, when Ash turned 12, we decided she was too big to spank. Since then, she’s just gotten naughtier and naughtier every year. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: (dismayed) Can we pleeaze get this over with??? vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM, POP & DE JUDGE: Quiet! vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: Well, you folks have learned a sad lesson. Truth is, folks, that children, especially little girls like Ash here (he taps her thigh lightly w/the switch, evoking a whimper) are never too big for a good spanking from their Mom and Pop, when they need it. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: Well, Ash’s behavior certainly indicates that she needs it! vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: And from now on, Your Honor, she’s going to get it! In fact, I intend to take her over my knee and give her a bare bottomed spanking with my hairbrush as soon as we get her home for embarrassing us like this. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: Oh, but honey, I think she should have some time in the corner to think about her misbehavior first. And I was planning to take her over my knee and give her a good strapping. vbcrlfvbcrlfASH reacts to this news by wailing in horror and struggling all the more violently, kicking her feet until one Mary Jane actually flies off her foot. vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Well, first we’d better let De Judge carry out his sentance- it’s almost lunchtime. We can discuss Ash’s punishment later. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE steps back from the prostrate young criminal, takes a few practice swings, allowing plenty of arm reach with the wicked looking switch, and then soundly applies the supple rod of chastisement to the wicked girl’s hapless bottom. Throughout the following scenario, ASH kicks her feet and flails her legs, drumming the hell out of the judicial desk. She makes futile promises to be good, and protests that this is unfair, her parents don’t love her, etc. At last she merely bawls like a baby. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE (punctuated by fierce strokes of the switch): Let this be a lesson to you, young lady! I don’t ever want to see you brought before this court again!! And I expect you to mind your loving parents and do as they tell you for your own good! There are plenty of teenaged girls and boys out there whose parents don’t love them enough to spank their tight– hard– sleek– little bottoms when they’re naughty until their soft– muscular –cheeks are rosy red… (he stops at this, red faced and panting, apparently overcome. DE JUDGE mops his brow with his handkerchief. There is a barely discernable lump in his Sansabelt slacks.) vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM and POP allow ASH up from the desk and she hops from foot to foot, crying her eyes out and howling in shame and pain. She rubs her backside with both hads in a futile attemp to soothe her smarting posterior. vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: That’s enough, missy, now settle down and thank De Judge for being so lenient. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: Back in my day, De Judge whipped naughty girls and boys on the bare bottom! vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: (with pleasure) Yes, in front of the whole town, too! And we didn’t have any problem with young juvenile delinquents running wild in the streets back then! vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Young lady, De Judge is waiting… vbcrlfvbcrlfASH, much chastened and humiliated, shuffles her stockinged foot and lowers her head, blushing furiously. The grownups wait expectantly, MOM tapping her foot, and the poor girl finally manages to mutter: vbcrlfvbcrlfASH: Thankyouforspankingmeyerhonor. I’llbegoodfromnowonsirIpromise. vbcrlfvbcrlfPOP: Well, I suppose that’s good enough. Thanks again, Your Honor, I can’t tell you what a great service this is to my wife and me. vbcrlfvbcrlfMOM: Yes, we really appreciate it. If only more law enforcement officials were like you. I feel there are too many bleeding heart liberals in the Courts, and there’s our whole problem. vbcrlfvbcrlfDE JUDGE: I agree, ma’m. Personally, I think most of them good use a good bare bottomed spanking, themselves! vbcrlfvbcrlfHearty laughter from all three grownups. MOM hands ASH her Mary Jane and gives the poor girl a pat on the bottom, causing her to wince in anguish. Freeze for a tableau. vbcrlfvbcrlfBLACKOUT

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